Have you ever sat down somewhere quiet and asked your mind to take you somewhere that's beautiful and warm where the sun gleams off your face as it reflects off the deep blue ocean? I have. In fact, I do this quite often, just to "get away". Sometimes I feel like my life couldn't go any more wrong, until I'm soon reminded that someone has had "A change of heart".
Moments when I know I'm screaming at the top of my lungs, but because of not seeing a reaction from the world, I just stop. Why continue? Isn’t it just pointless? Frustrations begin to overwhelm me, taking over my emotions, only to leave me withered and empty, yet full of doubt...doubt of myself, my ways, my purpose, my entire reason for being here. Where am I? How do I leave from here?
Do you ever find yourself asking these questions? Do you feel overwhelmed in fear that you'll disappoint someone close to you? I know I have. As a matter of fact I constantly felt this way, until I found "my place". A journey that kept me wanting more, and full of desire to be better; for me and my loved ones. Regardless of my past mistakes, my past judgments of those around me, I could now be forgiven, and start over. You know how this happened? God, that’s how. God died on the cross for me, he washed away my sins and paid the price for all my wrong(s) in life, and in return I only had to pledge my faith and love to him! What a deal ~!~ He paid such a huge price for me, a nobody, and useless, worthless nobody, just so I wouldn't have to. How many friends do you have that would do this for you? That would give their life just so you would have the chance to live in happiness, in joy, and in Christ. I can't say that I have any friends that would make that sacrifice; no one except God, Jesus Christ himself. Take a minute and go to that place we spoke of earlier, that place where you feel most comfortable, safe, and full of life. Who is there with you? I know who walks with me....My lord and savior, Jesus Christ. He never leaves my side, and is the reason I am given life, the reason I can say thank you for supplying my everyday needs. The reason my children have food and shelter, and clothes on their back. The reason my husband loves me, unconditionally, regardless of the faults I have. Jesus Christ is my reason today, and all the tomorrow’s to come.
God bless,
Cramelia
